By Anna Fender
Former Governor Arnold Schwarzenegger has announced the formation of a new anti -social media company with long-time personal trainer and photographer Lord Mueller who documented his rise and fall in Arcadia a few years ago.
The company will be known as “SHUT _UPPA_YOUR_FACE” will focus on exactly that. Silly faces of politicians and any twit who posts selfies; and stupid comments via Twitter will also be censored accordingly.
In accordance with a new law, signed today, April 1, 2525 … all Facebook posts will be immediately re-directed to ‘“SHUT _UPPA_YOUR_FACE” where Arnold’s hand-picked crew of personally hand-groped women will edit the posts according to their particular whim on any particular day. Arnold will personally “supervise” these women while they delete stupid comments.
In addition to the new anti-social media company, Mr. Universe announced an alternative to Twitter by transforming his own biceps into 40 characters ranging from Mighty Mouse to King Kong. The company will be taking over Disneyland effective April 1, 2525.